My only memory of being told that I could write was by a friend back from schooldays. One fine day she walked up to me and thrust two little books into my hands. Autograph books with colorful pages having blue/yellow (or was it red?) velvet cover. Final year of school and people were passing them around like nobody’s business. Mobile phones were not so common, so if you do a little math, you get to know that I am in my late twenties now. That is all I am going to reveal. My better half calls me UR and goes around by the name iWoz. It has nothing to do with Apple computers,Steve Jobs or Steve Wozniak.It’s from his school days.Funny!I mentioned both our school days in the very first post.He was asked to write an essay on a postman.With his problem of understanding tenses, he began with ‘I was a postman…’which should have been ‘I am a postman’.He loved his mistake so much that,he started calling himself ‘iwas’ which later on became ‘iWoz’.Me, being me jumped when I heard that and asked him,’So, what am I?’He said,’you are’.And so I became ‘you are’ which was shortened to ‘UR’.Anyone wondering,why he ended up with me?We have a friend who happens to be ZK,but he insists that I call him Zorro.One odd bunch.
So fellow beings, from here on it is totally your calling whether to read further or not. I don’t blame you. We get appalled looks from people around all the time. Going back to the slam books, on asking her why two books, my friend told me, in one I am supposed to write my address and usual cheesy stuff like ‘Trees say CUT ME NOT, flowers say PLUCK ME NOT but I say FORGET ME NOT’ or ‘Remember M, remember E, put them together and Remember ME”. Whereas in the other I could fill up with whatever I like. You ever heard of handing a driver license to a 9 year old? No one had trusted me with something like that before. I went off the deep end with markers, crayons and sketch pens. I wrote things like ‘Be careful, I bite’ with a set of vampire teeth drawn next to it. Most of which were shamelessly copied from my sister’s autograph book. Seeing my unleashed (borrowed, I admit, but she did not have a clue) creativity my friend quipped,’Wow! You could be a writer!’. That was music to my ears but a little voice in me squeaked ‘Cheat!’.
Then I decided to take the matter into my own hands when I got into college.I paired up with a friend for creative writing competition.We had to write a short story based on a picture.To be honest,I couldn’t make head or tail of it and dint give a damn about the story as long as we gave a big,fancy title to it.I came up with ‘coup de grace’.It couldn’t get bigger or fancier than that.and we won!I was mighty impressed with myself.Puffed up with pride, I was not going to be quiet about that,was I?I bragged and strutted for a full year(yes,full year for my 5 seconds of fame)that my totally annoyed friend paired up with another girl for the next year(How could you D?).To my utter shock and disbelief they won.Talk about deflated spirit.To quote iWoz I was feeling ‘down under the mid nights’.
And it took all this writing for me to come to the point that I am no writer. This is my feeble attempt to see whether anyone would actually read what I write. If you have reached this far, you are wonderful. You know that don’t you? I can come up with a superman or Catwoman doodle for you and write “YOU ROCK!”below that.
PS: What is the cheesiest thing you have ever read in an autograph book?iWoz came up with this-‘After a long time shall we meet, when I ask HOW ARE U? Please don’t ask WHO ARE YOU?’.Really?